i promise to get back to writing.
this is not the start.
at least not the start i dreamed of.
i have within me a mixed bag of feelings.
which i don't know how to unravel.
or how to interprete.
it does matter.
i have got noone else.
sometimes, i think it's right in front of my eyes.
or right beside me.
or just a few button-pressing away.
yet i got no balls for all that.
oh how sorry i am.
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