it's been 4 days..

Eh ALAMAK. I missed yesterday's DOWNSTAGE LEFT event man. Sounded fun. But ergh, next time InsyaAllah. Medicine's been fun. So far it's been good. Nothing big. Lessons are catered to jog your memory after the long break from studies. And there are plenty of long breaks in between sessions these days. Hours spent doing nothing, but too short to go home.

But I'm sad. Rather dissatisfied. I need to pump.

OH! ADZFAR got his driving license this Tue! Ait ait. Powerlah mat. Truly the one who knows how to drive. 12 points, so far the lowest amongst those who have passed. Not to mention those who failed, like Kopi. Haha Kopi hopeless sia. His points are enough to count as ...rugby scores? ayye. Yeah man, this year's Hari Raya, we have a dedicated driver, though Jau will be in UK. Haha ait. I have FTT after this. This the only time this week I'm home this early. Thanks to Prof Kaur who dismissed us early for anat prac. YAY hope I pass easily then can book driving test already. InsyaAllah.



KILL.

KILL!

Suddenly, I realise that tomorrow is the start of lessons. Proper lectures, when school starts at 8am again. And, I somehow feel sooo unprepared. I don't know what's gonna happen. I am shrouded in a cloud of uncertainty. It's at a stage where I feel thoroughly uncomfortable and yet I also feel totally helpless. Este says it's the university blues. Hakim says take things as they come, just like what Harun says. I think it's a bout of something I dunno, something intangible, something which is enraging something inside me, something that's making me angry, uncomfortable, sad and angry again in endless cycles. I think it has happened to me before. I felt it more than once in RJ, but I can't pinpoint to what extent this current bout is similar its predecessors.



KILL! I certainly need to pump. I hate this disintegration.


On a separate note - a rather more upbeat one too - I actually managed to persuade Kopi, Rudy and Izzat to come for the barbecue. Haha. Not bad. Actually Rudy was bluffed into coming but it didn't matter (",) coz anyway there are lots of people there that knows him and the rest of them. Thank God for them. If not it'd be another one of those out-of-place moment again. Pui. Good food, great conversation all round. Sure makes the start of school look not so bleak after all. And found out that Shaf got into Med!! YA finally!! I bet she's very happy :) good stuff shafia! So now the "halal presence" certainly looks more impressive.

And the funniest thing was that that night, Siti Fairuz had to send like soo soo many people home and none lived near her. Haha damn poor thing ah. All the way to Boon Lay at like almost midnight. Apparently, we spent nearly an hour in the car travelling to and fro. HAHA gila ah damn long. But she the pro. Next time it's our turn to drive her around. Return the favour lah katakan.

Ok selamat. I want to sleep.

And Liverpool beat Chelski 2-1. HAHA TAKE THAT JOSE MOURINHO! But I still support Man Utd. FULHAM YOU WATCH OUT!

Goodnight :)


KILL!

some things to think about

on national day, we happened to be picnicking right beside ariff (rjc) and his family. i had fallen asleep for awhile in the tent, then when i woke up, ariff wanted to play soccer against us. so we played. haha, but the unfortunate thing is, we all left with scars and bruises that can match any rugby game i've been in. my shin can bear testimony. it has 3 red bruised marks. yeap. good eh?

i am quite nervous about school. i have yet to buy the more important books (snell, netters, guyton) and the whole schedule about school. i don't know about the timetable for medicine, whether we can take up other modules like ppl from other facs. all i know so far is everyday lecture begins at 8. and should end by 12, or latest 1. then there is probably tutorials, practicals or other things like First Aid! haha. and CCA. yes. CCA. this despite me thinking that i will go thru uni without a single CCA. hahaha fool. but somehow, this makes me feel occupied. occupied in a good way. not occupied because i have to dig a trench, make sure my platoon mates are also digging and observing safety, make sure the concertina wires and barbed wires are up, make sure water is replenished, etc. hahaha. that is occupied in a bad way, to me.

i have driving now. this after having consumed so much durian, potato chips, and a full load of rice and fruits. i think i'm gonna be sleepy. the last time i went for a night slot like this, the instructor asked: Hey isn't it bedtime for you already?! HAHAHAHA. boo to that. i take night lessons coz it's so much cheaper. cheap is good. saving is good. understand?

owned

I think I just owned myself today. How on earth does one get kicked out of mandarin class? I just did. I must restart next week. From Stage 1. Argh. Nvm slowly la ok one step at a time.

And last nite, Monday night, had to go all the way to Bishan to pump. Thanks ah Jau. Abit jauh considering I had the longest meeting I've ever been to that day. Hahaha.

And it's quite disconcerting to know random people visit your blog. Well, blogs are probably meant to be this way.

Tomorrow, national day, so I think I shall pump, then blade and run. Hahahahaha. Work it!

now i think i want to watch the campaign to confer the public service medal to jbj. sounds...controversial! sounds good.

....

hahaha i played two matches in two days. considering how unfit i was, those two matches serve as a reminder that i have to run. hahaha. i heard foxtrot just did 10click run. haha im sure i will never be able to finish half the distance in my current state of stupor. but whatever. i was walking throughout the matches. nevermind la, now old man already. i think my knee is buckling. maybe can get pes downgrade. hahaha. but i scored today. so who cares. yeah and i'm going to school tomorrow morning. that's like gonna be the routine for like the rest of my life already. yay. or boo. it doesn't matter. i have made the choice. it's time to live by it. so goodnght and have fun in brunei. hahaha.

eh alamak i forgot to add this.

I wanna watch THE SILENCE OF THE KITTENS by Wild Rice. This play has got some good comments in the papers. Only thing is, I've nobody to watch it with me. BOO!!!

gombak can go home okay

i hate gombak gym. or rather, i hate pumping alone. i just got back anyway. it is on a day like this when i question whether it was worth it even. the money invested. the time wasted. ah loser ah. i got tired in like maybe 5mins. so unmotivated. delta gym rocks, especially the new routine that i tried out for almost 3 weeks already. with jau and izzat, we would maghrib at ar-rabitah first then pump the night away. definitely seeing the results. but tonight i had to make an exception coz of driving. i booked a 940pm slot well in advance, seeing how soon school will start so i had to chiong as much as i can while i'm still free. 940pm slots are like the cheapest. and i kind of like driving at night. argh i'm still pissed at the lacklustre gym session. i hate gombak gym!!!

on another note, can't wait for bola tomorrow. hahaha. with such an unproductive session just now, i will definitely not be aching for a good game. aiiit. adz that mat got stupid dental appointment so he's not coming, argh. boo. who ask you to wear braces? argh i hope my boots are like not garing. if not confirm pecah tomorrow. puas selisih jauhkan.

dum bass

ohkay

Driving. I'm still a noob when it comes to clutch control. The car jerks. Maybe if I look at it from the outside, it should probably jerk like those gangsta-rapper crazy cadillacs which can actually dance. Haha loser. But, today's one was fun, coz I just went at 70kph almost all the way. I went to I think jurong west agaknya, some mrt stations there (Chinese Garden? or was it Lakeside?) entah. The western side of Singapore only reminds me of one thing: OCS! Haha. Then I think the instructor kenyang lepas lunch, so he ngantuk then fell asleep. I think it's typical for these instructors to fall asleep. So I drove all the way to Sungei Kadut. Haha. That's like where so many factories are. But now and then, he would mumble his instructions, while his eyes are closed. Haha. Then sometimes, he would put his five fingers in front of my face - that's a signal that I'm exceeding 50kph. Haha. Then he goes back to sleep. But shiok ah. A break away from the monotonous Bukit Gombak area.

Then I went to NUS for the PBM welcome tea. Ait. Not bad. Good food good brownies. I signed for downstage left and persuratan. Hoho. Time is the essence, boy. Oh, I think the MS people are supposed to call, semalam, but still no calls yet. Hurhur.

And I realised I should sign up for as many classes as I want to this semester. Coz I don't think I'll get to do tutoring at all until earliest Dec. Coz now, the period's very near prelims for most people. Very near exams, very unlikely there are students looking for tutors. So I shall just keep my eyes and ears peeled if by any chance (or, par hasard, haha I found this in my French jotter book) oppurtunities come along. So, if you know of students, TELL ME!!! I think I'm qualified enough to teach, aren't I?

For almost a month already, I haven't touched the soccer ball. Coz simply there hasn't been any oppurtunity to play. Then suddenly, 3 matches come up so quickly. Tomorrow the med people wanna play at the field, but its from 6-8pm, macam takde maghrib gitu eh. Somemore, I've driving at night so it would be rush. And on sat morning, I've to choose either to play with the MedFac soccer people or Peiqian with a game against the J1s. Since my 'beloved' coach Mr Kevin Low called up, I shall have to vee MedFac. Next time la MedFac. I wanna play with my friends. Haha. Ayye I don't have the MedFac soccer guys' numbers. Shoots they'll confirm be a man short. Haha. Die. But it's so exciting. Long time never touch ball.

OKAY that just came out wrong.

selamat ah. nak baca Quran.

matric fair

i love gym. i love pumping iron. my routine is back on track, now that i've found some partners to go with me.

i bought a laptop for school (and for play). should be a good buy, i hope. the only irritating part of it was the buying of the laptop itself. coz parents weren't allowed to even browse at the laptops, so how on earth are they suppose to compare models? coz in the end, the parents are paying. so they make the ultimate decision. then. then the paying alone takes you from point a to b to c to.... alot of points until you can find yourselves from mpsh to yih. and then at yih u still have to wait long long. dope.

and i like only signed up for ms and pbm. something which i thought i would not do. i dunno why. and i didn't sign up for any sports thing at all. why? ergh. dunno dun ask.

and i signed up for nus debit card. ergh...

and in my matric card, i look more like a coal-miner/coolie/slave labourer/illegal immigrant than a doctor.

but ayye... good stuff anyway.

before school starts,

Despite my lackadaisical routine of slumbering around at home, I at least managed to reestablish a workout programme. Now I've managed two sessions already, thanks to having contacted Izzat and Iylia - these are guys who are still in NS, but whose commitments are far lesser than a serious trainee. Now the body feels good again, more alive, more invigorated, more ready for school. Time to get more into pumping. The feeling of ripped-ness and tearing/shredding is definitely awesome, a welcome boost to my lack of physical activity. It certainly bodes well for the remainder week or so of so-called freedom.

Oh yes, I'm driving more too. I want my license! Hopefully, by year's end, InsyaAllah. :)

the last hope

When i visited Jun Ren yesterday, I chuckled to myself when I heard this:
That every year, there is someone from Raffles Rugby to claim the prestigious Infantry Sword Of Honour from his OCS stint from the January batch.

From Anand, to Cecil, to NingYan, to Kylash. All came from Raffles Rugby. This year, what happened was that there were a number of us (Raffles Ruggers) in OCS. So initially there were Jau, EC, Ang Wei, Joel Louis, Jon Yap, etc etc etc and me too. Most of them got posted to other places, like ADA for Joel Louis and Signals for Jon Yap. So the last one standing was guess who? ME! Haha I was the last hope. And that is well dashed by now. Coz I disrupted to do medicine! I mean not that I was in some position to get the SOH anyway, seeing how much I get whacked by my instructors for my relak approach to everything. Me and the army are like oil and water , they don't mix (is the word immiscible? ergh don't remember). Heh. But it sure feels good to know that I was the last hope. Damn damn good. I enjoy cheap thrills like this. :)

oh wait, Ananthakumar is still in Infantry. There is another one last hope!Or maybe Khalrul Anwar bin Yahya from the later batch! haha he has neck now hoorah!

LOOKING FOR A TUTOR?

Assalamu'alaikum wr. wb.

LOOKING FOR A TUTOR?

Look no further. Anyone who's willing to improve his/her grades for the exams, just feel free to contact me, Fairuz, at 9746 4126 or anaktamingsari2@hotmail.com.

I will teach YOU the way to earn more As, insyaAllah, if you haven't already got them.
I will teach YOU the way to pass if all you want if just to not fail.
I will teach YOU to teach yourself the smarter way about handling exam questions.


So if you're a secondary school student (anything, sec1-4, doesn't matter) living in the West of Singapore, and are in dire need of tuition, please contact me at the abovementioned number.

I can teach Mathematics, Chemistry, Physics, Biology and Combined Science (and Additional Mathematics too if you wish).
Plus, I can help give you inputs for your Malay/Higher Malay at no additional costs (for the moment though) and supplement you with Malay reading materials.

Some background of myself:
Currently a first year Medical Student at NUS.
GCE O Level (2003): 6pts L1R5
GCE A level (2005): 4As, 2 Merits for Phy and Chem S Papers, B3 for GP
Call me up to find out more.

The lessons will be conducted at your home.
Scheduling/length of each session is flexible (e.g: 4-5 times a month, 1.5hr weekly sessions).
Fees are negotiable (I'm a first timer but don't worry, you'll be in good hands).

So do call, InsyaAllah.

THE front row bench

I finally got down to proper driving lessons, as in practical, and yeah despite how easy it is, I had trouble with clutch control. Arranged with Joel to visit poor Jun Ren. Oh man, he is really really damn poor thing. So much to suffer yet so much still in store ahead of him. I personally felt good that I managed to talk so much with him, after so long. Definitely more than a year, since we last all sat down all over the front-row benches of RJ Canteen - traditionally shared by rugby, soccer, and hockey boys - to chitchat and lepak whenever we step foot in the canteen. Before morning assembly, that's where we met to discuss test answers which had been leaked from those who had taken theirs earlier. Or waiting for training to start, if no one was already playing touch by then. By touch, I mean touch rugby...well I'm sure you know. Or after training, to shower then to go for dinner. For me it would be to go for pre-dinner, coz I would still have dinner left for me at home. Or on non-training days, to wait for people to go for weights, watch movies yada yada. Ergh these days don't come back no more. Jun Ren is strong, he'll come back strong, let God be willing. :)

On another note, before I slept last night, I recited a few pages of the Holy Quran. One small step for man, one giant leap for mankind! Amin.

Our Lord! Give us in this world that which is good and in the Hereafter that which is good,and save us from the torment of the Fire'

Qur'an 2:201

medbooks & otherbooks

After sifting through them books and booklists, I only found out that I really need these books for medicine. The rest I have already. Yay. Can save money :) And that website is damn powerful. I haven't even checked out the cd that is power-packed with tutorial answers passed down by the M2s. I hope all these help!

For anatomy:
1. Frank Netter's Atlas Of Human Anatomy
2. Richard S Snell's Clinical Anatomy for Medical Students

For Physiology:
1. Textbook of Medical Physiology (Guyton and Hall)



And, I finished reading The Zahir. So many truths in the book. Or is it just that when one picks up a book, one is just so convinced by the coherency of the author that everything he says is true. And the acomodador (that's a Mexican Indian term for the "giving-up point"), that's so true of everyone. The Zahir gives me a sign. It's time to find my own Zahir.


Ohwells, on to The Devil Wears Prada... :)

oops apadah!

I unexpectedly woke up at 130pm today. I was thinking last night, hmmm, maybe wake up early to run. Maybe. But it never happened. I didn't even tidy up my shelves. But its not too bad, since all the med books are already there on the shelves. I realize I am lacking Anat books. Which is important, according to seniors. Maybe I can get them from Asrie. But why oh why do I have like 2 Biochem books? I even heard some seniors don't bother buying them, the notes are deemed sufficient. Heh it doesn't matter, I just appreciate all the help my cousin gave me. Handing the books down to me already is such a very kind thing, since the books are really really expensive wherever you go.

OH! And today, a very good buddy of mine, JAU, received his utmost gift so far. He was presented with the PSC Open Merit Scholarship, which apparently received some coverage from Suria. CONGRATULATIONS BRO! But omg I missed it! Sorry Jau! I wasn't home early enough so I missed the rerun as well. Argh. I think he's the sole Malay recipient of it this year. Wonderful achievement mat. Haha. But basket you must spend more time with us before you fly off. Okay? Don't just say InsyaAllah.


some light at the end of the tunnel...














in ocs, here we hang out...or get hung out to dry...


and who is diana?

so medicamp?

Aloha Loyang. I was in Snow White. We won alot but then got like last. Like wth la!? So what I don't care. I think the M2s are super rich. And the M1s also. I bet all of them are like driving to school. In posh cars. Their own cars. Basket. And everyone's gonna be on the dean's list and mug super hard even though they say they won't. And buy everything, including books laptops and skeletons. Hah! But its fun coz Raymond Ong was there. Haha superduper cockster. And I like made some new friends here and there. Okla. So wtv. Typical orientation.


I don't care.


Nothing's stopping me, you, and all of us from wanting to get what we want.



InsyaAllah I will get what I want, if I work hard for it. InsyaAllah.

lazysunday

Yesterday was a lazy sunday spent almost entirely at home. But it was good I thought. I read a lot from The Zahir. And it also dawned on me that somehow whatever we are reading can mirror what we actually are facing in real life. I do feel like I am the main protagonist in The Zahir. Omg so when I was reading that book yesterday, I had to put it down a few times just for reality check. Haha so that I know I wasn't dreaming. My goodness. That is why Paulo Coelho is such a powerful man. Brazilians may be more known for their football and samba, but he is a pioneer in the art of writing. I tested my sony speakers, yah they do sound awesome. Good enough for me. :)

We went east coast to "briskwalk". Haha like real. My parents are too unfit. I suppose yesterday made no difference to me, I need to run soon. Or else, I will definitely grow fat. Growing fat, or worse, remaining thin but growing rotund around the waist is a no-no. Its one of my biggest fears. Haha. I will run. Soon. Haha:)

We went airport to eat at Swensens. Like eeeee. The portions are too small my goodness. Cheat my (father's) money. And the desserts are not that nice anymore. Why ah? Don't have QC ah?

bros

I'm just online so often these days. Hee I wonder why :P But today I finally think I'll put a rest to my flagrant spending spree. I bought a Sony in-ear earphones which totally match my iPod Nano and they sound totally awesome. Haha that was at taka today. Which was after I had to queue up for almost an hour for Pirates tickets. Thankgod I still managed to grab the 530pm show for Iylia, Adz and Kopi. If not, none of them would have turned up. Haha. See lah, that's the life of a disrupted army boy. You also long for the weekend, coz at least you won't be so lonely with your bros around. Weekdays are the worst days. There is almost nobody around, so sad. Unless of course, you have camps to attend. Haha like nothing better to do like that. Exactly, because I've nothing better to do, I'm gonna attend another camp next week. Medicamp. Geez my inbox is constantly flooded with their posts, I end up getting irritated and just deleting them without reading. Haha :P So okay, stop spending so much money. Maybe I should spend more time sleeping. Sleeping, I heard, is a grand luxury in medicine school and later on in life as a doctor-to-be. Yup, InsyaAllah :) I feel like reading the Holy Quran byebye :)

runit

i bought some last minute closing down sale items yesterday. quite important lah considering uni will start and i do not want to be wearing the same thing over and over again. hee. well thanks to adzfar i got further 15% off, saving me some more money. i really need to find in-ear earphones soon, the current ones that apple provides can't fit into my ears. argh. unless of course somebody wanna sponsor. what are the chances of that happening? zero huh.

i was almost late for driving theory just now. it was so boring. and dry as usual. so when they asked for volunteer to sit on the $40,000 chair with the airbag, i thought wth just volunteer la. haha, quite fun, the airbag suddenly explodes in front of me. haha the instructor obviously thought it was funny. merepek la. i shud haf signed up for BTT earlier then i can start practical earlier. now by the looks of things, i will have to start practical when school opens. ayye, that means, more nights and weekend burnt. haha but don't care ah, the faster i get my license, the better.

alright, gonna watch pirates with my bros later. time to catch up with 'em. seeya :)