the kite runner

I finished reading The Kite Runner.

I know now why I truly enjoyed reading the book. There were so many episodes in the book that described medical conditions so vividly. I was rather amused at the writer's profound knowledge about medicine and pathological symptoms. Turns out, the writer's a doctor! And how amazing isn't it? An Afghan doctor who is also a brilliant writer. Khaled Hosseini - his books are to be watched out for.

God gives you talent. Just what it truly is, it's for you to find out.

clear

mediocre grades?
not gonna stop me from enjoying my books, enjoying my theater, enjoying my football, my television or my sheesha.

at the end of the day, i know what i want and that is all that i am working towards.

reading The Kite Runner. that's my escape, my exit, my one-way ticket, my sortie. an incredibly riveting and powerful story.

this, this was not the way i intended this entry to turn out. it could be better. but that's not important.

what study?

An extra crazy weekend that was totally unrelated to the hustle and bustle of studying medicine.

Thursday night:
NAFA Malay Drama Presentation at NAFA with the DSL gang
followed by supper at Al-Tazzaq along Haji Lane

Friday night:
Malam Pentas at Malay Heritage Centre with Kopi
followed by dinner and sheesha at El-Sheikh
I was super groggy and broke too

Saturday morning:
Heart for Art Charity in school, played Captain's Ball and Football with the Med guys

Saturday evening:
Supported the Lions along with 55,000 others at the National Stadium with Zhihao and Geoffrey
Too many taunts and flying-nike poster-paper aeroplane-homing missiles to remember

Saturday night/Sunday morning:
Fetched the sister at Changi Airport
Drove to the former Hazwani at Clementi for supper
Sister's friends crashed my house

The rest of Sunday:
A day with Guyton and/or Snell?
Don't count on it.

How about sleep? YEAH....!

Funny I used the word weekend, when it involved Thursday and Friday as well. I don't care lah. My weekends have 4 days!

enough already

How can people say that everyone is a leader?
This thing about everyone is a leader is overstated, overused and I'm jaded already.
If you know you've got it, you don't need no leadership training camp.
You don't need motivational talks.
You may feel down at times but it is just God's test of your skills.
You have innate skills already so use it.
But if you have doubts about your quality, obviously you don't have it.
Training can improve you slightly but you will never reach the levels of those who really have it.
So...
Leave the leading to the real leaders.
Prophet Muhammad, Gandhi, Martin Luther King.
You?
You really sure you belong to those names above?

just something I suddenly thought of

The Popular Junkie The Popular Junkie is a person who is always fascinated by all things popular. Most of often he or she lets popular culture dictates his or her thinking and end up following the popular trend. He feels it cool to be following popular culture, because then, he is also part of the popular group. If not, then he feels left out, incomplete and insecure about himself. He is most comfortable when he is around his group of fellow Popular Junkies. Among them, they have all things popular, wear all things popular, talk all things popular and eat all things popular. Crumpler bags, iPods, adidas originals jackets, converse sneakers, Sony Ericsson Walkman mobile phones, that Justin Timberlake album, the likes.
And when they are together in a group, individually they are assessing one another. Who has something new - that is popular - which the others don't? Then, there will be a craving to also own that particular new popular item. And more. And a new cycle of craving begins. A vicious cycle. It is almost like trying to outdo one another in the popularity junkies stake, but in a subtle non-competitive way. I think we have lotsa them here in Singapore. Don't you think so?

On another note, Suria shows are getting rather addictive. I am transforming into a Makcik TV, but well done Suria!

You know that famous Marilyn Monroe pose? It wasn't the underground blowers that got her dress flapping. It was:

tres bien

my favourite part of the whole vacation was going to paris. okay i lied. it was going to old trafford to watch manchester united play. but the trip to paris was more special, i think. somehow, everything that i learnt from french class came back. it came flooding back. without me having to open up any books to revise whatsoever. i bought metro tickets for my family, ordered lunch and dinner, booked taxis, negotiated prices, read signs on signboards, asked for directions. and it was all in french. with the correct sentence structure and grammar and proper pronounciation. it made me tremendously happy when they understood me. and i understood them back. it is a miracle i can still remember the language after all of these years. and to hear the natives speak the language, awwe it's so beautiful. madame faussat was right. i should have gone to france then. i would have loved it even more. now i feel like writing her a thank you email. only thing is, i don't have her email address. this sucks.



and paulo coelho writes that we all understand and speak 2 languages. one, the language of the people. we use this language to communicate with other human beings. two, the language of signs. God communicate with us through signs and we can sometimes understand them.

whaaat

Fairuz -- [noun]: A master of storytelling 'How will you be defined in the dictionary?' at QuizGalaxy.com

ifonlyyoulistenmore

have i told you?
I hate conversations.





and I love Manchester United.

my favourite song that I picked up having spent one fricking cold evening at Old Trafford for United's last game of 2006 versus Reading:

Mooooouuuuriiiinnhhoooo,
Are you listenin'?
Keeeeeeep the trophy glistenin',
We'll be back in May,
To take it away,
Walking in Fergie wonderland...

pass

haha shit i passed the driving test. no more L plate. no more bbdc lessons. no more abusive pakcik instructors.

but shit la, no car.

hahaha shiok stuff i drove all the way to safti to fetch iylia and then fetch izzat at his house at bukit merah then to vivo city. shiok stuff. considering i only received my temporary driving license hours ago. hahahaha. yay! kopi i passed earlier than you. i even knocked down pole during vertical parking. but tester was kind to me. we went to vivo city earle swensens to have dinner. coz jau my brother has just returned from london. hahaha that kid spent the first day back with his minah la who else. and then we walked around a bit before screwing off. i send izzat home first before almost getting lost in bukit merah. but no lah. i can find my directions no problem. i wanna drive some more. just like what shahira felt like. some newbie enthusiasm is good. hahaha.

and i'm flying off to europe tomorrow morning. byebye. you won't see me till semester begins. next year. yay byebye.

have fun anat group! at yingliang's house! hahaha.

spinese and engalay

Remember there was some hoo-haa when Stephen Rahman-Hughes acted as Hang Tuah in the musical Puteri Gunung Ledang? Alah when the makciks made some noise lah "why eh some ang moh become Hang Tuah...?" My message to the makciks: Wake up and smell Globalisation!

Because why? Because in another musical that is going to debut in New York very soon, Placido Domingo the Spanish tenor is going to act as Emperor Qin Shi Huang in the musical The First Emperor. Maybe Stephen Rahman-Hughes had some if not very little Malay blood in him. But Placido Domingo being even mildly Chinese? Woh...

Somebody call for a DNA test!

just to paint a bleak picture

Snell's Clinical Anatomy
Wheater's Functional Histology
Lippincott's Biochemistry
Netter's Atlas of Human Anatomy
Guyton's Textbook of Medical Physiology

sampai next year habis pun tak akan habis baca.
ishhh.
kalau habis baca pun tak habis faham.
double ishhh.

But at least I know I've made one correct diagnosis already this year. A hairline rib fracture. I palpated the point on the rib (the fifth rib) and asked some questions. Cos it's the fifth rib, which means it's near his nipple, he had to shift his nipple away before I palpated. I did not want to touch his nipple. YUX! Who's that person? Ahhh just somebody famous enough within the community. Or maybe infamous. Haha. Doesn't matter. He checked it with a doctor and I was correct, X-ray proven. What matters: I made a correct diagnosis.
YAY not bad I learn ok I did not zombie through med sch sem 1.

S03B we're having a gathering soon. Tomorrow evening. Arab St. Be there!

holiday is finally here, you hear?

And now there is finally a proper breather since school properly began. There are so many things that are starting to excite me, such as pumping again (gosh, the wasting away is awful) and driving. This is it, just 4 more lessons and I'm sitting for the driving practical test. InsyaAllah, good stuff good stuff. I'm hoping the tester is good to me. Then JAU can come back from his LONDON and we can relak again one times good one. Last night was great, we overnighted at Rudy's, coz his parents went for a holiday and he needed company. HAHA. Izzat Iylia were there too, to wallop so many slices of pizza and chicken wings and waffles. Shiok stuff. Then Adz and Kopi turned up in the morning when Iylia had left. And we went Vivo City to relak again. Everyone bought something there, out of fun.


And I can't wait for Dec 21. It's my Eurotrip. Manchester, London, Paris and Rome. Yay :)








There was a time this year when DOWNSTAGELEFT came together to celebrate Hari Raya. Only that we went back to the 60s & 70s - the P. Ramlee era - and dressed up to style, like so:























fun!

kebutuhan

kebutuhan = keperluan

sedar tak yang kita semua ni ada kebutuhan?
dan sesetengah dari kita ni juga ada butuh (kaum Adam lah)
dan butuh tu sendiri ada kebutuhannya juga (hehe)

pelik,
aku terlihat perkataan tuhan terselit dalam perkataan kebutuhan itu sendiri
adakah elemen spiritual iaitu ketuhanan sesuatu yang kita semua perlukan dalam hidup?
macam, kalau takde tak sah gitu
betul ke?

pelik nombor dua,
kamus dewan memberikan contoh ayat di bawah ni:
"aku ni tak butuh wang"
betul ke? lebih-lebih lagi dari kamus melayu
ramai ke orang kita yang tidak butuh wang?
semua orang sekaya-raya manapun, tak akan tak pernah butuh wang
lebih kaya lebih dia butuhkan wang
habis tu, kaum melayu kita ni?
dahlah purata gaji bulanan kita adalah yang terendah berbanding dengan kaum cina dan india
dan peningkatannya juga yang terendah
siapa kita nak bohong dengan "aku ni tak butuh wang"
mungkin kamus kita kamus yang terlalu ideal
buat apa kita ikut kamus kalau hidup ni jauh dari yang ideal?


dahlah, aku lebih suka baca Guyton dan Snell
aku nak baca Guyton dulu, macam syiok baca Guyton

aku baru teringat!
tet tet tet tet tet tet tet tet tet butuh!
hahaha memori bolasepak di stadium kallang

Respons dari DOWNSTAGELEFT

Maklum balas yang mencurah-curah terhadap inisiatif segolongan mahasiswa NUS yang mementaskan ' melayu.com.sg' sememangnya amat menggalakkan. Namun, tidak dapat dinafikan bahawa terdapat beberapa maklum balas yang walaupun berniat baik, telah tersasar dari tujuan asalnya kerana kurangnya penelitian yang terperinci.

Dalam usaha mereka untuk mewarisi tampuk pemerintahan di dalam masyarakat, golongan muda amat memerlukan sokongan padu dan bimbingan daripada mereka yang telah lama menyumbang kepada kemajuan masyarakat dan jauh lebih berpengalaman di dalam perlaksanaan sesuatu inisiatif; ringkasnya: warga veteran.

Amatlah menyedihkan jika fokus utama perbincangan lebih tertumpu kepada poster pementasan 'melayu.com.sg' dan bukan pementasan itu sendiri. Bahkan, tanggapan yang dibuat mengenai pementasan tersebut dibuat tanpa pemberi maklum balas itu sendiri menghadiri pementasan tersebut. Malahan, pihak pengurusan Espalanade dan juga DOWNSTAGELEFT sendiri telah mengadakan sesi soal jawab dan maklum balas sesudah persembahan tersebut bagi menjawab pertanyaan dan juga menerima saranan/kritikan dari penonton sendiri.

Sayangnya, peluang ini tidak dimanfaatkan oleh pihak-pihak tertentu yang lebih selesa membuat tanggapan yang melulu.

Sesuatu ide mahupun mesej di dalam sesebuah pementasan tidak terbatas hanya kepada sebuah poster. Jika keberkesanan sesuatu pementasan hanya dinilai berdasarkan sebuah poster semata, maka mereka yang berkecimpung di dalam bidang seni pementasan hanya perlu menumpukan daya minda mereka hanya kepada rekaan poster tanpa perlu menghabiskan wang, tenaga dan masa untuk menyiapkan sebuah pementasan yang bermutu.

Sokongan dan galakan juga perlu diberikan kepada generasi muda yang mahu mendatangkan suatu perubahan yang positif dan tidak menjadi golongan yang pasif semata. Jika sesuatu cetusan idea diremehkan melalui tanggapan semata, di manakah letaknya ruang bagi menjana minda yang progresif? Bagaimanakah dapat kita menyahut cabaran Perdana Menteri kita yang inginkan lebih ramai belia melibatkan diri di dalam hal ehwal kemasyarakatan dan menerajui kepimpinan masyarakat jika masih wujud sikap suka memperlekehkan usaha di kalangan masyarakat kita ini.

Objektif utama 'melayu.com.sg' adalah untuk mengkaji soal identiti Melayu dengan suatu kajian yang tidak terikat mahupun tertakluk kepada pegangan agama kita. DOWNSTAGELEFT dan panel skrip bagi pementasan tersebut ingin mengupas isu-isu yang berkaitan dengan identiti Melayu berdasarkan watak-watak yang wujud dan bukan direka seperti watak seorang wanita yang mengamalkan hubungan sejenis (lesbian), seorang tua yang menghabiskan kebanyakan masanya di masjid dan juga seorang ibu tunggal. Nilai-nilai yang dipegang oleh watak-watak ini akan mengetengahkan kepada penonton betapa nilai-nilai tersebut menyumbang kepada identiti Melayu itu sendiri.

Memang tidak dapat dinafikan bahawa seringkali perkataan Melayu dikaitkan dengan istilah Muslim namun sepertimana yang tertera di atas, ' melayu.com.sg' cuba menangani isu identiti ini dari aspek kemanusiaan, tanpa tertakluk kepada nilai-nilai keagamaan dan apa juapun nilai pegangan kita semata-mata.

Saya bersetuju dengan Puan Asmidar yang istilah "Melayu" mencernakan keindahan, kelembutan, kecantikan dan ini amat bersesuaian dengan orang Melayu itu sendiri. Namum di dalam menegakkan nilai yang ideal ini, perlukah kita membelakangkan realiti sebenar masyarakat kita. Adakah kita mengetepikan ibu-ibu tunggal yang terlanjur dan membiarkan remaja-remaja kita hidup dengan label "Hanyut" sedangkan inilah realiti masyarakat kita kita sebagaimana yang diketengahkan oleh Encik Alami Musa di dalam sesi dialog dengan mahasiswa Melayu Islam di NUS baru-baru ini? Beliau menekankan hakikat ini agar usaha kita untuk menjadi suatu masyarakat yang inklusif tidak perlu mengetepikan sebarang individu pun. Dasar inilah yang mendorong tercetusnya idea bagi ' melayu.com.sg'. Penyelidikan dan temubual telah dilakukan oleh pihak penulis dan pelakon bagi memahami dan mendalami watak-watak ini bagi melicinkan proses penyampaian mesej kepada para penonton. Proses ini diberikan penelitian yang amat teliti di dalam rangka membina suatu masyarakat yang progresif tanpa mengetepikan sebarang individupun.

Bahkan, selain daripada terhibur, terdapat sebilangan besar daripada penonton yang meninggalkan Esplanade pada hari pementasan tersebut dengan suatu kesedaran tentang perlunya mereka melakarkan sesuatu untuk mengubah dan memperbaiki keadaan masyarakat. Tidak kurang pula bilangan penonton dari kalangan "emas" kita yang menyanjung usaha DOWNSTAGELEFT untuk menganalisa watak-watak yang selama ini dibiarkan membisu dan menderita di dalam kesibukan kita membina masyarakat "cantik."

Pihak DOWNSTAGELEFT akan tetap menggunakan pendekatan pementasan bagi mengetengahkan isu dan realiti masyarakat kita. Pendekatan ini, beserta dengan usaha-usaha persatuan-persatuan, badan-badan dan individu-individu yang lain diharapkan dapat menyumbang kepada tercetusnya suatu masyarakat yang bukan sahaja menyedari akan nilai-nilai bangsanya yang ideal, namun juga menerima dengan hati yang terbuka akan realiti sebenar masyarakat kita.

DOWNSTAGELEFT masih muda dan perjuangan kami masih jauh. Oleh itu kami menerima sebarang teguran dan kritikan dari mana-mana pihak. Namun, amatlah diharapkan agar teguran yang diberi biarlah adil, bernas dan mengemukakan alternatif yang konstruktif tanpa perlu merendah-rendahkan daya usaha kami.

Sebelum saya akhiri, ingin juga saya jelaskan bahawa DOWNSTAGELEFT adalah kumpulan teater yang berdiri sendiri tanpa sembarang kaitan bersama Persatuan Bahasa Melayu Universiti Kebangsaan Singapura (PBMUKS). DOWNSTAGELEFT ditubuhkan awal tahun 2006 dan dianggotai oleh mahasiswa-mahasiswa yang bukan sahaja dari Universiti Kebangsaan Singapura ataupun yang berbangsa Melayu sahaja.

Semoga Allah meredhai setiap sumbangan kita terhadap kemaslahatan masyarakat khususnya dan sekaligus umat manusia amnya.

Yang benar,
Fezhah Maznan
Pengarah Artistik
DOWNSTAGELEFT

H/P: 91990977
E-mel: downstageleft@gmail.com

brouhaha

"Kalau inilah realiti yang akan ditunjukkan oleh orang-orang yang keluar dari menara gading, saya betul-betul sedih."

I would say that this is the reality shown not by future graduates. But this IS the reality shown by several groups within the Malay community itself, and these groups traverse various educational levels, especially those in the lower rungs of the educational ladder. We have seen our fellow Malays in such revealing tops in the streets (an obvious sign of the infiltration of Western influence), and we shake our heads each time. Or we write in to the local newspaper. Meaning we are not ready to accept this culture into our own.

So we had our play to ask this question to our audience. We shall present to you a non-mainstream culture, somthing that the society calls 'a problem'. We present this problem to you in the perspective of the affected problem individual himself (or herself). We are probing you, our Malay community, with these problems. We are not offering solutions (in response to the first article which is hoping the play would unearth solutions for such problems). We believe offering solutions will be rather limiting and restrictive and will undermine the whole idea of theatre, which is suppose to probe questions and awareness and perhaps, reveal some understanding. In that sense, giving solutions would be to cheat our audience. And who are we to give solutions? Anyway, back to the problem, the answer as to whether our community can accept such cultures is now apparent. The answer is no (since we are still so concerned about dressing!). Or maybe not yet. Or maybe, never. I'm not saying it is a bad thing that we do not accept such things. Maybe never is better for our society.

The point is, I think ultimately it is good that we are discussing these issues. If this is the effect achieved for the rest, then I believe we have achieved some form of success just from our publicity of the production itself, even though it is achieved via controversial means.

However, sometimes we do get ahead of ourselves. And failure to take a step back to see the bigger picture may lead to disastrous outcomes. I think it is a valid comment that we observe tata-susilah and also kesopanan pakaian even though we want to throw a burning controversial social issue at society, in our pursuit of theatre. I think we could have exercised more restraint but we didn't hold back. Sometimes in theatre, one cannot hold back, but in other areas, one should learn to not take a step too far. I guess then this as a lesson for everyone?

"Buatlah sesuatu yang boleh dijadikan ikutan dan contoh yang baik sesuai dengan ilmu yang dimiliki."

I can agree with this statement. Here I hope what I have offered you as my take on the brouhaha as something that is 'sesuai dengan ilmu yang dimiliki'.

MELAYU.COM.SG

"Aku nak sembahyang, dia tak nampak sembahyang aku."
"Ish kau tengok pompuan ni, tak habis-habis talipon aku pasal reception."
"Kids? You don't have to get married to have kids."
"Aku tak tau plak sejak bila kain nih ada magic."
"My dad's a Muslim and my mum, a Catholic."
"I know I am a Malay, but no, I refuse to live like one, with such disappointing attributes."
"Ada empat pompuan kat rumah ni, semua pemalas. Semua tak boleh harap."
"Aku tak peduli. Aku akan tetap pergi Hard Rock bila ada Reggae Nite."
"Kau ingat budak muda nak sangat ke tengok wayang kat masjid tu?"
"Sayang...bangun sayang. God, I love the way you look when you're asleep."
"Mana kau? Beranakkan dia, diri dah setengah mati, mana kau?"
"Ini interview untuk apa? Anak ni dari universiti mana?"


Inilah Melayu kita dan masalah-masalah Melayu kita. Bukan semuanya dapat dipaparkan tapi sekadar yang mampu, apa yang lebih menarik itulah yang dipaparkan. Bukanlah Melayu kita ni hanya bermasalah sahaja, cuma menerusi masalah inilah kami harap dapat mengetengahkan kelompok-kelompok yang mungkin dilupai, tidak dihiraukan, diketepikan sebelah, dan mungkin terputus hubungan sekaligus. ia sebagai cerminan untuk kita semua masyarakat Melayu Singapura. Tapi, sediakah kita menerima mereka? Adakah mereka itu memang telah terlangkah jauh sungguh untuk dikembalikan ke pangkal jalan? Atau adakah kita akan terus buta dan membabi-buta dan buat-buat buta?

Jawablah sendiri. Aku akan mengemaskinikan diari maya ku bila masa mengizinkan.

you know what you are missing. i have just the solution:

17 & 18 NOV 8PM
ESPLANADE THEATRE STUDIO
TICKETS ON SALE AT SISTIC





watcha waiting for? 

on a rainy night from kembangan

Taxi Driver: Hallo! HALLO! Why you never cancel?
Me: You are calling me now, how to cancel?
TD: Hallo!? You better cancel...You make booking what...Call the office, the office is calling me...
Me: HELLO? If you are calling me now, how I call the office? You hang up now then I can call office to cancel. You put down now.
TD: No Why you never cancel? I cannot pick up passengers know.... You quickly call now. Must call now.
Me: Since when do people cancel taxi booking?
TD: Mister you better call the office hor. You make me drive here all the way then never wait for me.
Me: But another taxi came earlier.
TD: No NO I want to know why you never call office.
Me: I called but the office say "Please hold while we connect you to a Customer Assistant". But the Customer Assistant never pick up.
TD: You call Office nowwwwww!!
Me: (pasrah) okok fine.
TD: THANK KYUK!

'melayu.com.sg'

the absolute reason for keeping 17 & 18 November free

craziest toys this raya!

latest stikfas action figures, now available at all leading toystores. batteries sold separately.
















gua nak cakap sikit.
wa tak makan nasi belen.
wa tak main.
nasi belen lu boleh simpan sua.